Friday, November 02, 2007


If you have decided to leave the little monsters off the invitation… Congrats, on making a stand that will not be accepted by many!

Mr. Military and I planned a very formal wedding and decided to EXCLUDE children under the age of sixteen. The decision earned me the golden title of "Brideszilla." If being shunned by half the family was not bad enough, it’s been suggested that “we” (the bride and groom) should pay the cost of childcare service for our guests.

So I ask, is this customary??? Should we “the couple” take responsibility for providing childcare?

I don’t have children … and therefore, I never took into consideration childcare while planning the wedding. As the hostess, I’m busy planning the menu, table decorations, floral arrangements, catering menus, accommodations, and transportation…. I never anticipated adding, “finding a babysitter” to the checklist.

Honestly, It’s way too much responsibility to be held accountable for the well-being of someone else’s child. I’m the bride, it’s my wedding – I have enough to worry about without taking into account babysitters, special kids meals and/or anything else that deals with children.

So I turned to Mr. Military and asked for his thoughts on the subject. He said, “I don’t know any babysitters, I’m certainly not paying for one… Are they crazy?!?!? I think we need to remind them…. THEY’RE NOT OUR KIDS… and NOT OUR RESPONSIBILITY!"
(I know it sounds harsh, but he has a point)

Contrary to popular belief, we have hearts.... We love our nieces, nephews, godchildren and little-friends. We've changed diapers, wiped noses, gone to disneyworld, the aquarium, the children's museum, spoiled them on their birthdays and purchased them the biggest gift under the tree. We love them and they are a huge part of our lives. However, our wedding is a VERY FORMAL AFFAIR -inappropriate for children.

As a courtesy to our guests with young children, we've compiled a list of local sitters with the help of the hotel's Concierge. The information will be included with the response card. The card reads, “ADULT RECEPTION” … followed by: “As a courtesy to our guests with young children, we have assembled a list of local sitters. Please contact Lily for more information…. 1-800-BABYSIT.”

Originally we planned to make an exception for the Ring Bearer and Flower Girl (Afterall, we did request their presence at the wedding). However, we quickly faced a "rippling effect” ---- siblings, cousins, and newborns --- All parents feel entitled to an exception. It seems there is always someone you should make an exception for, and that leads to someone else, and before you know it…. A Moonbounce has replaced the Ice Sculpture…. Trust me, it’s just too hard to keep things equitable! For this reason, No Kids, No Exceptions! As for the Ring Bearer and Flower Girl…. At our expense, we’ve made arrangements for a babysitter (of the parent’s choice) to pick the children up from the Chapel and take them out for pizza.

Although it’s our day and we don’t feel a need to justify our decision… For all the parents, who demand an explanation…

    • Aside from the cost $125/plate,
    • The hall only accommodates 150 guests…. And we’d rather be socializing with a person our age.
    • I would not bring children to a bar (and hope that parents would not either.) So, why would we invite them to a reception with an open bar from 6pm –midnight
    • Adults should be able to see aunt Sarah fall off her chair without having to explain it to little Johnny
    • It is an evening affair (ending at midnight) we don’t want guests to leave early…. “Emily’s tired, we’re going to take off and put her to bed”
    • Children get bored at these events
    • I’m sending invitations out to celebrate my day… I want the focus to be on us…. –the married couple-
    • A wedding is the perfect excuse to pawn the kids off on Grandma, splurge on a sitter, and enjoy a kid-free night, of drinking, dancing and socializing.
    • And to earn my title as Bridezilla… I REALLY DO NOT WANT ….
      • Nursing
      • Screaming
      • Running Children
      • Spilling drinks
      • Blowing out candles
      • Throwing food and favors
      • Eating food from their neighbor’s plate
      • Throwing temper tantrums
      • Bumping chairs and tables
      • Knocking over fragile and expensive decorations

Quite frankly, we don’t want kids at the reception. It is our special day, our dream, our decision ---- guests should respect it!


Blogger Andrea said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

Saturday, November 03, 2007 7:04:00 AM  
Blogger Andrea said...

Miss Bowie said...

Aside from your wedding, I think anymore there are major issues with the fact that everyone is always trying to "give their children the world." Not that I don't believe that children should be given every opportunity that can help them but there are less and less restrictions and boundaries for kids these days.

I (and my fiance) am a teacher and I can't tell you how unreasonable parents have become with regard to their children. They refuse to do anything but instantly gratify or ever say anything but yes to them. It's very disheartening and scary since (behavior-wise) I can tell you that it is not helping their children to become well-adjusted "people" in this world. The world can be their "oyster" still if it's not given to them all at once and right away.

We are planning to have children at our wedding but ours is vastly different than yours since we aren't even serving alcohol.

Best of luck dealing with this!!! Hopefully the novelty of name-calling will wear off soon. Amazing how childish ADULTS can be when THEY don't get what they want too! :-p

Saturday, November 03, 2007 7:07:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What I'm more surprised at is...why can't they see this as an opportunity for a night out without the kids...just husband and wife? I'd think this would be something they'd be looking fwd to.

Sunday, November 04, 2007 10:29:00 PM  
Blogger Bsam said...

What are you doing about kids DURING the ceremony? I worry about this, a crying baby during our vows?? How do I handle that? any suggestions?

Tuesday, November 06, 2007 2:46:00 PM  

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